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  • Lynn Catalano

10 Signs of Love-bombing



Imagine being bombarded with all of your favorite activities, gifts, and compliments all of the time. Seems like some kind of wish-fulfillment operation.

Have you ever been:


I once wrote that I believe there are 5 steps in a relationship with a narcissist:

  1. Charm & Seduce

  2. Alternate Cruel & Kind

  3. Belittle, Abuse & Mock

  4. Write-off & Reject

  5. Rinse & Repeat


What is future faking?


People who suffer from NPD are in a hurry to serious with their relationship. They start talking about marriage or living together or children in the very early stages of dating. I saw my father do this with the first woman he dated after my mother died. He was planning for them to live in Florida for the winters and our town for the summers. This never happened. Narcissists love to talk about the vacations you both will go on or the house you’ll live in or how many children you’ll have – but it’s all unlikely to occur. Once they have you hooked, they forget about these promises. Narcissists slide into the next stage of the Narcissistic Abuse Cycle and become distant and cruel.

Love-bombing is done not just to seek love but to gain control. Narcissists love control and need to control everything – situations, people, etc.


What is love-bombing?


Love-bombing is a form of emotional abuse where someone seems to be going over and above displays of affection and attention for you but in reality, it’s a manipulation to gain control.


Love-bombing looks different for everyone but usually involves some form of the following 10 signs:


  1. Showering you with gratuitous gifts and outings

  2. Exaggerated compliments and praise

  3. Premature planning of your future (future faking)

  4. Staying in constant contact with frequent texts, calls, etc.

  5. Seeking a quick commitment to solidify the relationship

  6. Doesn’t allow you to spend time with anyone else

  7. Jealous of everyone and everything that diverts your attention

  8. Completely ignores your boundaries

  9. Expresses an intense need for you guised in passion


Love-bombing is very different from a loving, healthy relationship. You’ll know when you don’t feel safe, there’s no mutual respect, you don’t trust the other person and there’s no open communication.


When do narcissists use love-bombing?


Love-bombing is commonly associated with narcissism.

People who suffer from narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) frequently love-bomb their partners. Experts believe this is because narcissists are low in empathy and consistently attempt to manipulate those around them. They use love-bombing in the honeymoon phase of the Narcissistic Abuse Cycle.


Be aware. The tactics are meant to overwhelm you and make you feel like you’ve found Prince or Princess Charming.


I wrote about this in my book “Wrecking Ball Relationships: How to Identify, Live With or Leave the Narcissist in Your Life.”


“Beth believed her compassion and strong sense of empathy attracted him. He had a story of woe and she bought into it – hook, line, and sinker. She wanted to help him and be his friend. He continued his mission of love bombing, purchasing gifts for Beth, and providing special things well beyond her budget. He made her feel like a princess. She felt his adoration. He even accompanied her to a work event where he obsessively watched her the entire time. Beth found his behavior kind of cute. Never before had a guy paid so much attention to her. Beth bought into the whole package.”


What should I do if I’m being love-bombed?



Go no-contact with the person. Talk to someone, someone who gets it. It’s important to realize you shouldn’t keep it inside. Make sure to reconnect with family and friends you’ve been isolated from during the relationship. You will always feel like you are walking on eggshells with this person, never knowing when you will set them off.


This is why it’s so important to talk to someone after you’ve suffered this type of abuse. But not just anyone. You need to find someone who’s familiar with narcissistic personality disorder. You see, I didn’t get here by accident. I didn't set out to become a narcissistic abuse recovery coach. But after I’d suffered this kind of abuse, I realized that my story and my experience could help so many people who’ve suffered similarly. When someone tells me about their struggles and their story, I’m not just understanding. I really get it. I’ve been there. I’ve felt those same emotions, that same rage, and loss.


Often, we stay in these cycles of abuse because we don’t believe we deserve something better.


You do deserve better.


I have a brand new program starting soon. Get more information here: https://www.lynncatalano.com/wrecking-ball-warriors


I can help you.

Click here to book a free session with me.


You can find my book “Wrecking Ball Relationships” on Amazon and BarnesandNoble.com.




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