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  • Lynn Catalano

How to outsmart a narcissist


People who suffer from narcissistic personality disorder are cruel, uncaring, and disrespectful. It’s incredibly challenging to peacefully coexist. You need to be aware of their tactics and protect against the harmful effects on your mental, emotional, and physical health. I share all the ways showing your high emotional intelligence helps you navigate a narcissist with my coaching clients.


Show your high emotional intelligence


Emotional intelligence is the ability to regulate, understand, and manage our emotions while recognizing, understanding, and influencing the emotions of others. Some of the components of emotional intelligence include:

  • Self-Awareness

  • Empathy

  • Practicing Reflective Listening

  • Being curious, not judgmental

  • You use the pause

  • Accepting responsibility for your actions & apologizing


When you keep your emotions and language in check, you disarm the narcissist, and they are left to their own devices.


Remember, Narcissists have low emotional intelligence


What are some characteristics of narcissists that show their low emotional intelligence?

They have:

  • No Empathy – they are categorically unable to exhibit empathy

  • Very Low Self-Awareness – no idea how their words and actions affect others

  • Lack of Accountability – never take responsibility for their actions

  • Very Poor Coping Skills – can’t regulate their own emotions & have tantrums

  • No Social Skills – bad listeners, use people for their own benefit


I wrote about this in my book Wrecking Ball Relationships: How to Identify, Live With or Leave the Narcissist in Your Life.”


“Narcissists are toxic people with an exceptionally low level of emotional intelligence. They never self-reflect, don’t care whom they hurt, don’t listen, and don’t respect anyone.


Gaslighting eliminates the hope of ever having a fair fight. Possessing high emotional intelligence provides us with the strongest tools to resolve conflict, express concerns, and communicate them. Narcissists don’t possess these tools. Manipulation is their tool to maintain control and make themselves feel superior. Your best reflex is to be educated and aware of the narcissist, the signs of gaslighting, and refuse to engage. The best defense is to walk away. You’ll win your peace of mind and that’s priceless.”


If you’ve suffered this type of relationship, it helps enormously to talk to someone. When you're in a toxic relationship, you need to talk to someone about your emotions and your trauma. I’m a survivor of narcissistic abuse and now I coach people on their healing journey. I give people clarity, validation & comfort. My program is results-oriented that’s quicker than therapy without extra analysis, just strategies to implement immediately. You could choose to do nothing and nothing will change or you make an investment in yourself. When is a good time to get started?


Learn more about me here: https://buff.ly/3wf6tgQ

Click here to book a free session with me. We’ll figure out if we work well together.

You can find my book “Wrecking Ball Relationships” on Amazon and BarnesandNoble.com.


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